Children and divorce
Family Divorce And Separation
Family Divorce And Separation
- Children's feelings are important. You can help them understand their feelings by talking about how they feel. This will help them work through emotions ranging from anger, hurt, jealousy and fear at a difficult time such as a separation.
- When parents separate or divorce children feel confused, guilty, sad and often have a sense of loss. This is a difficult time for parents who are already feeling mixed emotions. It is important that you share feelings with your children and explain the changes to your family and how these will affect them. Don't expect them to understand everything.
-
Ways to help children cope:
- Reassure the child that they are still very much loved by both parents and that you will always be there as parents for them.
- Reassure the child that neither parent will stop loving them or fall out of love with them.
- If possible have both parents present to take turns explaining the divorce or separation, especially when telling children for the first time.
- Make it clear to the child that divorce is something between parents and NOT their fault.
- Younger children need explanations repeated several times. To make sense, keep the words simple. As they get older a more detailed explanation can be given.
- Children wonder what will happen to them, where will they be living, who will take them to sports lessons. Be clear and give answers as soon as questions are asked if you can.
- Acknowledge that your child will miss the absent parent and their family and encourage phone contact.
- Avoid confusing your child's loyalty and love for the other parent. Children know that parents are unhappy and angry with each other.
- Avoid saying bad things about the other parent. Remember they are still the child's parent. It hurts the child when they hear negative things about the parent.
- Author Ruth Webber says : Each arrow aimed at the other parent goes straight through the heart of the child.
Parenting tips & parenting articles copyright & courtesy
Department for Community Devlp,
Australia.
Children Helping
::
Brothers And Sisters ::
Family Divorce And Separation
Sole Parent Families ::
Blended Families ::
Home
Go To Main Parenting Index Page