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Teenagers Physical Violence And Confrontation
- Violence is frightening.
If you're a single parent, especially a single mother, violent or
disruptive behaviour is very alarming.
- Violence is often
bullying or picking on someone who is weaker. It may come from a lack of
self esteem or the need for power or control.
- Some parents may have
been, or still are, in an abusive relationship so the teenager may only
know angry violent ways of solving arguments or disagreements.
- Anger triggers anger. If
teenagers are spoken to angrily, or shouted at, they are likely to respond
in the same way.
- Violence is never
acceptable. There are certain ways of controlling feelings of rage and
helping your child overcome these destructive behaviours.
- Walk away from the
situation until everyone cools off.
- If your teenager is
aggressive and rude, try to stay calm and explain how hurtful you find
the behaviour. Make a time later, when everyone is calm, to discuss the
issues.
- Try to express your
feelings. Anger and resentment, if bottled up, can become destructive.
- Try to work out what
caused the behaviour. Frustration and anger can cause teenagers to speak
rudely or shout.
- Keep questions
neutral.
- Talk about the
problem, don't attack the person.
- Help the person
understand your feelings when discussing the problem, so they can
understand how you feel. Then listen to their side.
- Sarcasm doesn't work.
If the other person can't express themselves well or is hurt by sarcasm,
the argument may only get worse.
- Teasing may seem good
natured but often is a cover for real feelings and can sound insulting
and unpleasant. It can also make the other person feel you aren't taking
the problem seriously.
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