Waiter, do you have frogs legs ?
No sir, I've always walked like this.

Waiter, what's this fly doing in my soup?
Um, looks to me to be backstroke, sir...

Waiter, this egg is bad
Don't blame me sir, I only laid the table !

Waiter, there is a fly in the butter !
Yes sir, it's a butterfly!

Waiter, waiter! There's a dead spider in my soup.
Yes, ma'am, they can't stand the boiling water.

Waiter, there is a mosquito in my soup !
Don't worry sir, they don't eat much !

Waiter, there is a dead fly swimming in my soup !
Don't be silly, dead flies can't swim !

Waiter, there's a fly in my soup!
Surely not, sir. It must be one of those vitamin bees you hear so much about.

Waiter, this soup tastes funny !
Then why aren't you laughing ?

Waiter, your tie is in my soup!
That's all right, sir, it's not shrinkable.

Waiter, this coffee is terrible, it tastes like earth !
Yes sir, it was ground yesterday !

Waiter, there's a caterpillar on my salad
Don't worry sir, there is no extra charge.

Waiter, waiter! There's a spider in my soup.                                                                                      Send for the manager!                                                                                                                           It's no good, sir, he's frightened of them, too.

Waiter, there is a dead fly on my steak !
I don't know sir, perhaps it died after tasting it !

Waiter, there is a fly in my soup !
Yes sir, he's committed insecticide

Waiter, what is this creepy-crawly doing in my salad?
Not him again, he's in here every night !

Waiter, there is a fly in my soup !
What do you expect for 20 Rupees, a beetle ?

Waiter, there is a fly in my soup !
Just you wait until you see the main course !

Waiter, there's a fly in my soup!
Couldn't be, sir. The cook used them all in the raisin bread.

Waiter, what is this cockroach doing on my ice cream sundae ?
Skiing sir !

Waiter, waiter! What's this creepy crawly thing doing in my dinner?
Oh, that one ? he comes here every night.

Waiter, there is a small slug in this lettuce
I'm sorry sir, would you like me to get you a bigger one ?

Waiter, there's a fly in my soup!
No sir, that's a cockroach, the fly is on your steak.

Waiter, there is a dead fly in my soup !
Yes sir, it's the heat that kills them !

Waiter, there is a beetle in my soup !
Sorry sir, we're out of flies today !

Waiter, there is a wasp in my pudding !
So that's where they go in winter !

Waiter, there is a slug in my salad !
Sorry madam, no pets allowed !

Waiter, there's a fly in my soup!
Keep it down sir, or they'll all be wanting one.

Waiter, there is a spider drowning in my soup !
It hardly looks deep enough to drown in sir !

Waiter, what's this fly doing in my soup ?
It looks like it's learning to swim sir

Waiter, there's a fly in my soup!
Its OK, Sir, there's no extra charge!

Waiter, do you have frogs legs !
Yes sir
Well hop off into the kitchen and bring my meal then please !

Waiter, there's a fly in my soup!
Force of habit, sir. Our chef used to be a tailor.

Waiter, there is a fly in my soup!
I know, but unfortunately we are out of turtle.

Waiter, why is there a fly in my ice cream ?
Perhaps he likes winter sports !

Waiter, there is a fly in my soup!
Sorry sir, maybe I've forgotten it when I removed the other three.

Waiter, there's a fly swimming in my soup!
Then we've served you too much soup, the fly should be wading.

Waiter, can you get rid of this fly in my starter !
I can't do that sir, he's not had his main course yet !

Waiter, bring me something to eat and make it snappy
How about a crocodile sandwich sir !

Waiter, there's a dead fly in my soup!
Yes sir, it's the hot water that kills them.

Waiter, there is a dead fly in my soup !
No its not, it's a piece of dirt that looks like one !

Waiter, there are two flies in my soup !
That's alright sir, have the extra one on me !

Waiter, there is a dead fly in my soup !
Oh no, who will look after his family !

Waiter, there's a dead fly in my soup!
What do you expect for 5 rupees - a live one?

Waiter, what's this fly doing in my soup?
It's fly soup sir!

Waiter, what is this bug doing on my wives shoulder!
I don't know - friendly thing isn't he !

Waiter, there's a fly in my soup !
Yes, it's the rotting meat that attracts them !

Waiter, there is a frog in my soup !
Don't worry sir there isn't enough there to drown him !

Waiter, waiter, there's a bee in my soup.
Yes Sir, it's the fly's day off.

Waiter, there's a fly in my custard !
I'll fetch him a spoon sir !

Waiter, there is a fly in my soup !
Yes sir, thats the manager, the last customer was a witch doctor !

Waiter, there is a slug in my salad !
I'm sorry sir, I didn't realise you where a vegetarian !

Waiter, this coffee tastes like dirt!
Yes sir, thats because it was only ground this morning.

Waiter, what is this stuff?
That's bean salad sir.
I know what it's been, but what is it now?

Waiter, there is a bee in my alphabet soup !
Yes sir, and I'm sure there is an A, C and all the other letters too !